{"id":866,"date":"2015-11-04T05:50:21","date_gmt":"2015-11-04T05:50:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.biblionalia.info\/leah\/blog\/2015\/11\/04\/ronandhermy-zenosanalytic-chazkeats\/"},"modified":"2015-11-04T05:50:21","modified_gmt":"2015-11-04T05:50:21","slug":"ronandhermy-zenosanalytic-chazkeats","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.biblionalia.info\/leah\/blog\/2015\/11\/04\/ronandhermy-zenosanalytic-chazkeats\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"

ronandhermy<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

zenosanalytic<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

chazkeats<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

autisticenjolras<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

hades isn\u2019t a badass. hades named his three-headed-guard-of-the-underworld-dog spot. hades whispers to his flowers to make them grow. hades grows fruit. there\u2019s no sun in the underworld.<\/p>\n

hades isn\u2019t a badass. stop saying this false thing<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

#hades probably double knots his laces<\/a><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

In myth, Hades\u2019 most remarked upon traits are 1) how responsible\/reliable he is, 2)how sober-minded he is, 3)how dedicated, implacable, and long-remembering he is, and 4)how boring<\/i> and grim<\/i> most of the other Olympians think he is to be around. Oh and notably, that if you play him a song he likes, he\u2019ll basically give you anything you ask for(though not without conditions).<\/p>\n

Hades is, canonically, a gigantic nerd. If they\u2019d had trainsets, he\u2019d have been the Olympian who collected trainsets, meticulously corrected<\/i> with exacto knife and hobby-paints the errors toy-makers introduced<\/i> to those trainsets, and then endlessly talked about<\/i> those trainsets to anyone sat next to him at Thanksgiving Dinner \ud83d\ude10 When he wasn\u2019t trying to rope them into an interminable discussion about gardening or divine law, that is \ud83d\ude10 \ud83d\ude10 He\u2019s the sort of god who frequently handed out punishment like giving someone a million-piece puzzle where every piece is shaped the same, that resets itself at the start of every day if you don\u2019t complete it, and then he keeps the last piece on his person at all times as a secret private joke for eternity<\/i> because he finds you personally distasteful(not even because he\u2019s mad at you or hates you particularly; he just doesn\u2019t like you as a person) \ud83d\ude10 \ud83d\ude10 \ud83d\ude10 He is. A Gigantic. Nerd.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

He\u2019s also like one of the only gods who is faithful to his wife. And he listens to her like when she asks for a soul to be released and he\u2019s like\u00a0\u201cBut honey, the rules.\u201d And she just gives him that look and he goes\u00a0\u201cYes dear,\u201d and lets the soul go with the easiest freaking instructions ever in a myth. And the human still fucks it up. Not his fault Persephone, not Hades\u2019 fault this time. Essentially, Hades is sorta like the accountant suburban dad who collects really specific figurines and gets really grumpy when people mess up his lawn. Do you know how hard his wife worked on those roses? He is calling his attorney. Oh wait, he is also an attorney. \u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Because sometimes you need to take a break from research and bring ancient stories into modern context and smile. <3<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

ronandhermy: zenosanalytic: chazkeats: autisticenjolras: hades isn\u2019t a badass. hades named his three-headed-guard-of-the-underworld-dog spot. hades whispers to his flowers to make them grow. hades grows fruit. there\u2019s no sun in the underworld. hades isn\u2019t a badass. stop saying this false thing #hades probably double knots his laces In myth, Hades\u2019 most remarked upon traits are 1) … Continue reading “”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4eTPU-dY","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biblionalia.info\/leah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/866"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biblionalia.info\/leah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biblionalia.info\/leah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biblionalia.info\/leah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biblionalia.info\/leah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=866"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.biblionalia.info\/leah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/866\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.biblionalia.info\/leah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=866"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biblionalia.info\/leah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=866"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.biblionalia.info\/leah\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=866"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}